Dear Friends,

It’s about time I gave you an update on the progression of this life. Day by day there are new changes. Nothing is as it was the day before. One lesson sure, is that none of us can have any expectation on what our life is tomorrow. I can tell you; I actually love being on the edge. And the truth of it, when I close my eyes at night, I ask, “Is this the night?” And smile. And feel glad that it might be. This edge is so close to the other side, that while you think it is death coming, it is actually life giving. It’s the place that we sit to quiet ourselves so that all we can know is the presence. And it’s in that presence that love is beyond anything we can ever guess, or know, or anticipate. And we all think we know something about it. Yet every moment there is more and more, it shows itself to us. So, here I am in this process where everything I do that has the potential to sustain life requires that I commit myself to life. Yet again, and the truth of it, and the heart of it, I just want to go. There is no giving up, or no loss. It is just the way things are. In my heart of hearts, my wish is to live in the Will. And it’s that Will, that will take each one of us sooner or later. Death is wonderful. Life that’s lived near death is wonderful. 

There are two major things to know. One is that we are all loved. You are loved. That is constant and always. And two, death is not to be feared, death is to be embraced or welcomed no matter what our age. I say this with joy and love and gratitude. One question I get, is do I have pain? The answer is, “Yes, there is pain.” And it’s a strange thing because the pain itself is God’s attention to this wayward soul. It’s a beckoning, a calling Home. 

Now, I’m not looking into the cause of whatever made this cancer in my body happen. Yet at the same time the wanton disregard for human health by our corporate conglomerates are making toys and gadgets and addictive things that disorganize our energetic bodies. It’s all done with profit in mind. It’s total irresponsibility. And it’s up to us to really come to understand how the mechanisms of that really work. Because the people making those things, however shiny they look, however wanton their marketing is, is designed to sell a product and make profit, not designed to give us clear protection for the sanctity for our health and well-being. Even those of us that live the cleanest of lifestyles are subject. If it was possible for all of us to take our cell phones and throw them in the trash, we would all be better for it. The convenience comes at a high price. And it’s not just the cell phones. We have to take and evaluate the places we live and do things that help us be in the order of life-sustaining practices. All the way down to the basics of, is the water we are drinking supportive to be in the integrity of its God-given design. Because all the electromagnetics are disturbing that order. 

So I am here, on this Sunday morning, with my daughter who is writing this down for me, with the most glorious wonderful team, supported by Sasha, Sean and Sandra and my family and Lotte from afar and all of your love. And I’m the lucky recipient of all of your love. And you are the lucky recipient of each other’s and mine. Our lives are short, let’s make good use of them. Whether I die in a number of days or live another 8-10 years, it’s totally up to Lord’s will. And I smile and rejoice at every prospect. So you can wish as you may, and I want you to know that I have no wish, except to go Home. It’s my only wish. And to go Home under the terms of the Lord’s will. That prospect makes me so happy. 

So, progress? There is nothing to report progress on. To live longer? Yes or no. To live shorter? Yes or no. I will say this, when you get a terminal illness, they love to give you drugs, and they are useful. My experience with Oxycodone was horrific. I don’t recommend it. I’m still recovering from taking several doses in the beginning. Totally confused my awareness of up and down. Such a simple thing. Like, what is down? Down in our bodies in our energetic system, in our involutionary system is necessary for the most basic things. In this place, there is no room for vanity. We are just raw human beings. Everybody pees; everybody poops. And the right amount of drugs buffers the pain so we can concentrate. Too much drugs gets you stoned so you can’t. That’s in this place. So right now, on this day, I’ve been in recovery from drug induced constipation. As I’m coming out, I’m learning about down. Down is good. Down is the direction that poop comes out. No vanity, just the facts. And I’ve had to relearn. It’s that simple sensation of gas passing through this body. 

Now on top of that, there is the heart of it. There is the glorious Lord, guiding every step of the way. I hope what I’m writing here is making some sense to you. And know that we have been on this earth together. We have touched each other’s hearts and souls. And if in doing any of that, I have transgressed or hurt any of you, I am so deeply sorry. And at the same time, I’m so deeply grateful to know you as we have. It’s a good life. 

Thank you and deep blessings to everyone. 

I love you,

Ray Castellino

14 thoughts on “Dear Friends,”

  1. I think of you often Ray. I have cherished learning and sharing with you. Albeit some 12 years ago now.
    With best love
    Brendan ( or Brandon ) as you folk used to call me, from New Zealand.


  2. Dearest Ray, You’re a magnifican human being with such grace and style. Your gentle ways and understand are unparralled in this work. Your contributions and affects on individuals are vast and amazing. I often reflect on my classess with you and womb surrounds. You are the beholder of light and growth. Thank you for your amazing spirit and movement throughout this time. My best and love to you. peg


    1. Dearest Ray,
      During my life I have met 5 masters and you are one of them. The gifts you have shared with us will live on and on and you have made a difference in the world. What else could one ask for ? Thank you for the gift of you.
      Many blessings and much love on your healing journey. I look forward to seeing you on the other side!
      Much love,


  3. Dear Ray

    I’m so grateful for Every breath shared in all aspects of the magical experiences in and out of the work. It is a true blessing. Gods gift will flow in our river of life forever.

    I feel you embracing this edge and my heart is filled with Love and Deep rest.

    Thank you Ray
    I love you


    1. Liebster Ray, hab vielen Dank für das Teilhabenlassen deiner Erfahrungen, sie sind so kostbar. Auch ich profitiere immer noch von einem „Baby“ Kurs in Vienna von Dir vor ein paar Jahren, als ich auch Lotte kennenlernen durfte.
      Vielen Dank dafür.
      Sind wir nicht alle „seine“ Babys?
      Du hast mir geholfen es besser zu verstehen, besser zu begreifen.
      Der systemische Ansatz ist mir ganz deutlich im Herzen geblieben.
      Mit dem Wissen kann ich als Cranio Therapeutin heute Familien viel ganzheitlicher und besser helfen.
      Als Palliativ Schwester berühren mich Menschen die das „nach Hause gehen“ wie du es tust und uns auch noch dran teilhaben lassen sehr denn es ist nichts weniger als die eine, einzige Wahrheit die du so schön beschreibst .
      Wir kehren zurück zur Einheit.
      Wie gern wäre ich dir eine freiwillige Praktikantin gewesen um mehr von deiner Arbeit zu sehen aufzusaugen und zu lernen, bitte Sei dir bitte Gewiss du hinterlässt mir dennoch viel durch deine Arbeit und dein Lebenswerk.
      Falls du irgendetwas brauchst bitte lass es mich wissen.
      Ich möchte nicht übergriffen sondern nur hilfreich sein:
      Bestes Medikament gegen Übelkeit ist meines Erachtens Vomex supp.,
      mit niedrig dosierte Morphin Tropfen gibts meiner Erfahrung nach richtig gute Erfolge, hab keine Angst davor Ray. Ich liebe Dich auch mach’s gut mein Lehrer, Freund und Bruder.


  4. Dear Ray and family,

    From afar I have had my thoughts with you since I found out. I have felt your love Ray and sent you mine. I really wish I could be there but it is clear to me Now that love transcends distance. I hear His love in your words and just like my Dad all there is to cling to is His will and love, and light. That is the progress His will is what matters most. Thank you for your listening Ray, for being a Dad while I was in your home, for opening your home and family to me the way you did, with an open heart ❤️. I learned so much from you, I treasure you listening skills, your love in what you do, the pow wows, your salad dressing which we love, you have placed with love many more things and it has been a great life! We all love you so much and am glad we will continue to feel it. Because it is clear to me that love transcends time and space,

    My deep love to you, Sandra specially, Sean and family and Sash.

    Ma Cristina Montúfar D.


  5. Dear Ray and family,
    You have touched my heart, my soul. I have been in the surround holding you, holding your heart. I have been singing to you, the way we sang together. I love you. Thank you and God speed.
    Edith Langley


  6. Dearest Ray and Family,
    What beautiful words to treasure! Thank you so much for sharing your gifts and your life Ray, a life lived to the full with so much joy gathered and shared with so many. I am so glad we managed to talk this summer after such a long time!
    One of my lasting memories of my first visit to Santa Barbara is roller blading along the beachfront in the warm afternoon breeze with the sound of laughter coming from children and families all around!! What a fantastic and precious time those years were!
    Thank you all from the bottom of my heart for the love, warmth, joy and acceptance that always flowed from your workshops, clinic and home.
    I love you all, and keep you in my thoughts.
    Be well,


  7. Well said Ray. I feel the peace you are in and presence. Wonderfully expressed.

    Also, I love the picture and the delightful loving humor expressed.

    Sending the love back to you.



  8. Dear Ray,
    Do you ever look good on the edge, in fact you paint a radiant picture! We’re very grateful for your depth and all you shared.
    I have very good memories of our times together, going back to the first time we met at a Polarity Association Conference in North Carolina in 1986. You were so kind and welcoming to me as the outcast representative of Alive Polarity. That was a touching and unexpected surprise.
    I’ve also enjoyed our interchanges while visiting the Dera, especially one year when you created a slideshow with music that was particularly touching. I hadn’t slept for two weeks. I found out later the cause was a chemical they used in processing cashews in India. But meanwhile, as I watched your slideshow of the western guests and the guesthouse, I felt so moved that I was crying. My wife was taken aback and asked, “What? You don’t even know most those people!”. Haha, the cashews…
    Again, now I am touched by your sharing your love and appreciation of life and the awesome significance of this Path we walk.
    May you fall into His arms.
    Radha Soami,
    Peter and Yvonne Ney

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Dear Ray,

    I don’t know you on the physical, (we all know each other in spirit, especially kindred souls) but I know Sandra. I am very touched by this beautiful and inspiring sharing. I echoes my experience in going to the other side in a near dying experience about a year ago and a “shared” death experience I had when my mom transitioned into spirit. (I wrote a recent blog about that on my website).

    The doctor whose research and protocols helped me heal all my lifelong health issues and regenerate my body, Zach Bush, MD has hospice care as one of his three board specialties. He described a night when three very different patients had near death experiences. Zach speaks about how all three when coming back to consciousness, describe that same “And it’s in that presence that love is beyond anything we can ever guess, or know, or anticipate, ” that you describe.

    I feel privileged to know the experience of that presence through my meditative practice. And I experience also that is DOES grow, the more we open to it and the more we nurture the relationship with that presence.

    I am so happy for you to touch into that as a living experience in your current stage of your journey. May your journey continue in an ever expanding way with that presence and the knowing that you are that presence in a very real way.

    Love and blessings,


  10. Dear Ray, I am wishing you a joyful transmission in peace and you are leaving the same way you have been living. Pain stops and the light carries you home. Love never dies and will remain – always. We are connected through love and this is what the universe is made of. Wherever you are now the love will be in our hearts and I feel gifted that I’ve met you. In deep gratitude. Bodhi


  11. Dear Ray,
    I receive all this news after your passing and just must share a few thoughts and say goodby for now.
    Your Presence showed me so much and healed me.
    And I just want to thank you for coming into my life.
    As I journeyed to the Western shores after my mother’s transition. It was so transmutative.
    Helping and showing, I will never forget.
    Yes, totally a master I have met!
    Enjoy being on that side now, with the others.
    Say hi to Will and John and Mary Jo. I send my love.
    And I look forward to being there too when my time comes!

    Mucho blessings,
    Lucy Jackson
    Midwest Polarity


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